Friday, June 06, 2008

Bigger In Texas

Back in my married days, my spouse got me a subscription to Men's Health. I don't think she was dropping hints, but she is my ex-wife now.
Anyway, I remember reading that for every 15lbs you are overweight you lose a half inch in length of your... your... well... manhood.
I remember thinking to myself, "Now, that can't be right."
Well, I hate to say it, but... "It's twue, it's twue!"
Now it may not be exactly a half inch per 15lbs, I havn't broken out a measuring tape since college (and if you're a guy and you say you haven't done that you are a liar and can leave right now) but there is a noticeable difference. (I've dropped 35lbs... So far)
Sadly, I have no one to coroborate. Had I not dropped so much weight so quickly I might not have noticed... And before anyone else can say it, if I had had someone here to coroborate I may not have noticed so quickly.
Hopefully this will be some inspiration to any other guys out there thinking about dropping a couple of pounds this summer like T1G. The rest of the crew over there doing the weight loss thing seem to be women. I don't think this will be very inspiring for them.



At June 06, 2008 3:36 PM, Anonymous Anna said...

Well... I'm not too sure if this so true in the physical and not more on the psychological aspect. If it is true, perhaps the added length comes from the ability to view what was hidden behind the beer belly? Kinda like a hidden treasure per se
Bwahahaha...y'all are nutz and for me to believe this I want some scientific literature and fact Mr. "lose weight increase your package" K-Nine

At June 06, 2008 3:57 PM, Blogger K-nine said...

It's physical, but as far as fact goes, you ain't gettin' a picture of my package. If you want to come to Austin and ask nicely, I might show ya... Purely for your own peace of mind, of course. I'm too busy walking, working and at the gym (lazy) to look up any scientific data, but I can explain.

Laugh if you will, but not only do you get a "beer belly" but there is also a layer of fat that increases around the groin area (on men and women). The lower the % of body fat the thinner this layer. You don't so much "increase your package" as uncover more of it. The sad part is that it was always there, I just got it back. The good part is that my body fat %age keeps going down.
No change in the nutz. Me or them. Sound reasonable now?

At June 07, 2008 10:53 AM, Anonymous Anna said...

LOL... I believe ya. It makes since that you're just getting back what was yours in the first place.

At June 07, 2008 11:09 AM, Blogger K-nine said...

So... I suppose that means you're not gonna come look?

At June 07, 2008 3:24 PM, Anonymous Anna said...

Nah.. Size doesn't matter to me, it's whatcha do with it that matters

At June 07, 2008 3:26 PM, Blogger K-nine said...

Well... If ya ask nicely... Purely for your own peace of mind that is.

At June 08, 2008 12:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

if I drop 15 lbs you think I double the length of mine too.


At June 08, 2008 11:48 PM, Anonymous Oh, you know who..... said...


At June 09, 2008 9:38 AM, Blogger K-nine said...

Double? We're talking almost triple, baby!

At August 16, 2008 6:33 PM, Blogger DammitWomann said...

Holy Crap - this is hysterical! Almost worth a trip to Austin. LOL


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